Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Memo to Cloud Control

Dear Sirs, please send rain.
Although I know this request arrives at the first part of summer instead of August per usual, I hope that your scheduling department can see fit to line up a few rain clouds and ship them our way.
You see, things are very dry down here. I have been doing triage in my yard, sirs, and while I have sacrificed the front yard (to the chagrin of my neighbors), I was hoping to have a blade of grass or two in the back yard. That hope died sometime in April or May.
I never even planted my garden this year, the first time in many a decade I've skipped a small garden. You may remember how I love tomatoes, and peppers, and beans. But especially tomatoes, picked on the vine, eaten in the garden when they're still warm from the sun.
Once your department favored me with enough rain to grow corn, though it was only one season, and the first crop I'd ever planted. Made me think growing corn was easy. Never grew another decent ear of corn again. Corn has broken my heart, over and over again, but that's another story.
Something told me rain would be scarce this year and so I couldn't stand to see the stalks and vines of my little garden whither and dry, become scorched skeletons of what some of my gardens have been, so I never even planted this year. Not one seed. Not that I'm blaming you for that.
Gardeners are praying folk, you know. Always asking for rain, but not just any rain. We're particular. Too much rain is as deadly as not enough. A half-foot of rain in a few hours, no, that wouldn't help. What we need is a steady, slow rain. A refreshing rain. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about: a nice gentle rain to replenish the parched skin of our part of the world.
It's true, we could irrigate our yards and gardens with city water, that is if there was enough city water for everyone. But you guys up there in Cloud Control know city water is not the same as rain. Watering with tap water is like living for weeks only eating canned peas. Yuck. Something's wrong in tap water, and the plants know it.
So consider this a formal request, sirs: please send rain. I believe I've filled out the paperwork and can provide additional testimony if needed.
Between us, I've seen some of your clouds roll by, many of which could do the job quite nicely. Why just this morning I saw a whole freight train of clouds just full of water whistle in from the south, but they kept going, taking all that moisture somewhere else.
Wouldn't it be wise to save the freight and unload some of that rain here?  I mean there are parts of the world with way too much rain right now, tons more than they need, and here you're having to pay freight to bring them more. Save the tariff and drop off some rain right here. Save the trouble of navigation and route planning. We can take some of their surplus.
Of course, I don't want to pressure you. Never. But I've also communicated this request to your Boss, directly.
Until next week, all the best.

Joe Herring Jr. is a Kerrville native who wouldn't mind a rainy week all next week. This column originally appeared in the Kerrville Daily Times June 18, 2011.

For more information about Joe's book, which has over 200 historic photographs
 of Kerrville, please click here.

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